Meanwhile Ten Years Later
by comlodge
Summary: It's been ten years since the hellmouth closed and nine years since Spike had died again in Los Angeles. Now Buffy finds him in a supermarket...
1. Chapter 1 - The People You Meet

Oh crap! What was she doing here? She hated doing the grocery shopping. This was so Dawn's job. They split the chores. Buffy did the slaying related stuff and Dawn did the house related stuff. Just because Dawn was a bit big now, as they waited out the countdown until niece or nephew number two made its appearance, Buffy was sent on a mission to retrieve the weekend groceries. Not fair!

She cruised down to the dairy section, pushing the half full cart ahead of her, as she perused the shelves looking for that stinky cheese Giles liked so much. How on earth he could get his nose near enough to it to put it in his mouth, she'd never know. Not something she was willing to find out either. Good old cheddar was fine by her.

She found the item she was looking for and popped it into her cart. Checking the list Dawn had given her, she sighed in relief to find that she had everything she'd been sent for. Time to slay the self-service checkout. More total lack of fairness! She hated those things and they hated her! Why did she have to do that herself? She was putting down good hard earned money in this store. The least they could do is serve her. But no, it was all about the look after yourself here.

She moved to the nearest empty check-out spot and began unloading her trolley. She swiped the first item in front of the machine. Nothing happened. She swiped again. Still nothing.

"What's the deal?" She looked at the little screen. Oh, press start to start. Duh. She pressed start and swiped the item again. Nothing! "What now?" This is why she didn't do this!

"Can I help you miss?"

Buffy turned toward the voice. She looked up to see eyebrows raising into a swept back hairline and the eyes below them opened in surprise. "Slayer, er Buffy?"

"Spike? Spike..." She stood with her mouth open, staring at the man she believed was dead, again, these past ten years. Which, maybe he was or something worse. She reached out to poke his chest. Nope, solid flesh. He stood staring at her. She looked at him. Darker blond hair, slicked back still, bit of a wave, same scarred eyebrow, same blue eyes, cheekbones sharp as razors, that pouty bottom lip, jutting chin, same Spike, or not. A bright orange vest over a check, button down shirt tucked into khaki pants. Brown joggers poked out at the end of the pant legs. On his chest a name tag. 'Hi I'm William. May I be of service?' Oh my god!

"You work here?... You're a check-out chick?"

He let out a small growl as he pursed his lips in that all too familiar gesture that made his cheeks stand out a little more. Ten years. It was ten years since she'd heard or seen him and she still wanted to jump his bones. Right after she punched that aquiline nose of his and made it bleed down the front of his hideous bright safety vest.

"Why are you here? Why are you even alive? Again?"

He snorted down his nose. "Some things just don't seem to stick, Slayer."

"What's with the slayer bit, Spike. My name's Buffy. You had at least learned that back in Sunnydale."

"'Course. Just didn' expect to see you here, is all. Took me by surprise. Thought you lot were still in Scotland."

"And I thought you were dead. Again. In an alley, in Los Angeles. With Angel's people." The hands were on her hips, and she leaned forward, toward him, a look of something between anger, loss and something else, crossing her face. Spike stared into stormy green eyes.

"Pratt. Is there a problem here?" A pimply faced boy with a nasally voice had joined them.

"Ah no, Mr Jones. Just assisting a customer with her first time on the check-out." He answered the boy, while never taking his eyes from Buffy's face.

"Well get on with it. There are other customers waiting."

"Of course, sir." He did look at the boy now and gave him a curt nod. Buffy stared, open mouthed, at this exchange as the boy went on to the next check-out queue.

"So who are you and what are you doing in Spike's body?"

"Very ha ha, slay... er Buffy."

"Did he just call you prat? Doesn't that mean nerd or something?"

"It's Pratt, with two t's. Though why Angel used that name on my papers, I'll..."

"Angel? You're still working with Angel? He is so dead! How could he keep this from me? How could you keep this from me? What is it with you two? Still making choices for me? Doing what you think is best for me?"

Spike sighed. "Buffy, I'm working here and I don't want to get fired, so can you just put your stuff through and we can talk about this later?"

"Alright, William." She smiled sweetly as she drawled out his name. "But we will be talking later. What time do you get off?" Poor choice of words there, she thought to herself. Sure enough the trade mark smirk drifted across Spike's face, before it clouded over.

"Eleven. I can meet you down the street at Denny's."

"Okay." She drew a breath, nodded to herself as though coming to a decision. She looked up into that oh so familiar but somehow, not, face. "Alright. Eleven fifteen at Denny's. You'd better not be late because I will so hunt your ass down if you don't show. Now, which button am I supposed to push to get this stupid thing to work so I can get out of here?"


	2. Chapter 2 - Leave A Message

"Angel! Angel, pick up the damn phone and talk to me. Press the green button that says answer, you great pillock!" Spike groaned at thoughts of his technologically challenged, poof of a sire. Why could he discuss the complexities of Sartre but a bloody smart phone reduced him to a blithering idiot? Why was Buffy here? In this city? Why was life so bloody complicated? He'd had a simple mission, a simple place in society and he was getting by, happy. Maybe happy was stretchin' it a bit, but things were okay. He was his own vamp. He had a purpose. He didn't need complications, not now.

"Breaks over, Pratt. Back to the late night scaries, out for their milk and smokes." The Jones boy pushed back from the table he'd been sitting at, with a groan. "Geez, I hate late shift."

"There in a minute, Mike. Just checkin' in on the olds." Bloody Angel wasn't going to answer. Damn. No use leaving a message either. The great forehead couldn't work that simple task out either, usually. What the hell, may as well.

"Angel, it's Spike. Buffy showed up at the market. Large as life, with a basket of groceries that was for more than one. She's mad, 'course. Only to be expected 'cos once again I've been an idiot coward. She wants to meet me after work. Says she'll hunt me down if I don't show. Anyway, said I'd meet her at the Denny's up the road. She's pretty pissed at you. Call me." He pressed the end button. Bugger, he'd try again later.

...

"Angel. Angel, you'd better answer this damn phone. I'm so past mad! How could you do this to me? Again! You overbearing, old, self-righteous, self-flagellating... Oh, words fail me for how much I'm going to make you pay for this! If Spike's been around all this time and you kept him a secret, I'm so going to dance on your grave. Just 'cos you're all human being doesn't mean I won't bruise you some." No answer. That'd be right. Probably can't find the right button to push on the phone but he sure finds my buttons alright! I so want to kill something right now! Leave a message. I'll leave a message!

"Angel, it's Buffy. Would you mind ringing soonest. Please. Got a tiny problem I need to talk to you about. That'd be good. Bye. Oh, all the best to Nina. Bye." That rat bastard! He's so gonna pay. Good mind to sick Dawn on him. In her current mood she'd more than tear him a new one if she knew Angel was doing it again!

...

"Angel, Angel. Come on pick up the phone. You're in so much trouble mister. Buffy is so off her head, mad, right now. Answer, please. Oh, ow. Down junior. You're not coming out yet are you? Though I wish you would, I feel like a whale and I'm so over lumping you around. Come on Angel, pick up. Guess I better leave a message and hope you work out how to listen to it." Dawn sighed and rubbed her stomach, as she waited out the recording on the other end of the phone.

"Angel, it's Dawn. Um, Buffy's just come back from the market, yelling something about Spike and how she's so gonna kill you and then bring you back and kill you again and then stomp all over your grave. She's not making any sense and she stormed out of here after putting on her patrolling outfit - with the boots and all. She so doesn't patrol anymore unless something is really up her nose or some really nasty big bad is around. Um, can you call me back. I'm a bit worried she's gonna do something she'll be sorry for. And I want to know what you've done this time that's got right under her skin. Thanks. Byee."

...

"Bloody hell, ya big poof. Can't you once in my unlife be there when I need you. It's half ten and I gotta meet Buffy just after eleven... Pick up! Surely you and wolf girl aren't still at it. Nah, what'm I thinkin'. 'Aint got that sort of stamina anymore, have ya, real boy? Bugger, should'a stayed lost, shouldn't I? Knew comin' back here was goin' to get me in all sorts. Bloody hell, _where are ya_? Leave a soddin' message. Right, like you ever bloody listen to 'em. Angel, it's your favourite employee here and I've got a spot of bother that I need to consult you on, ya bloody... I mean ring me back... please."

...

"Why can't you ever just answer your phone, Angel? Not that I ring you all that much. This whole thing better not be what I'm thinking 'cos if it is, I'm so going to set fire to something! I shouldn't be upset like this in my condition. You're so going to pay for this if it's what I think. He's going to pay! Someone. Will. Pay! Answer the phone, Angel!" Dawn squeezed the phone in her hand as a small cramp passed through her overgrown belly. Her back ached all the time now and she could never get comfortable. Leave a message. That could be the theme song of her life, leaving messages.

"Angel, it's Dawn. Again. Please tell me you haven't been keeping secrets you have no right to keep. Buffy hasn't been this mad since she found out about Spike being back, right after he was gone again. That nearly killed her, if you remember. Call me."

...

"Angel, so help me god, I'm so going to... Ugh, never mind. It's time I got some answers from the vamp in question. We _will_be talking though, you and I. Count on it!"

...

"Ya bloody sod, Angel. Never mind. I'm goin' to see my girl. If you don't hear from me, I'm probably a pile of dust in the corner booth."


	3. Chapter 3 - Meet Up

The bike rolled slowly into the car park of Denny's. The rider put his foot to the ground and kicked the stand down with the other. He keyed it off and sat up for a moment. Sighing, he lifted the helmet from his head, placed it on the petrol tank in front of him, then swung his leg back and over the bike, to stand on the pavement beside it. He moved to take his leather jacket off, when a hand reached forward, to touch him on the arm.

"Leave it on."

Spike jerked away and turned toward his assailant. Except, it wasn't an assailant. It was a five foot nothing, stony faced, blond, slip of a girl.

"Buffy." He breathed the word out between stiff lips, that parted just enough to allow the word to escape. They settled into a pained little smile, before his bottom lip disappeared behind his top teeth and he tilted his head towards the ground; looked up through those thick, sooty lashes.

Buffy's hand dropped to her side and she looked up into his face. God! Why does he do this to me? Still! He's still so absolutely delicious. So devourable. She'd learned to care deeply for soul having Spike in those last, fear filled months of Sunnydale. She'd also learned she did want a bit of the monster, in her man. It'd all been too late and the timing sucked huge, what with the need for world savage and the fear of losing and, just... everything. She'd lost him, just when she'd found him. Them, maybe. She'd learned she could love, down there, in the mouth of hell. Holding this man's hand.

Spike took in a shaky breath, ran his hand through his hair in that achingly familiar way. It was like it was yesterday, like no time at all had passed, since she'd seen him.

"You know what, I don't think I can do this after all. Sorry." He turned and began to get back on his bike.

"You can't do this!" She shouted the words at his back. "You! Can't! Do! This! How selfish and uncaring can you be, Spike? Ten years! Ten, lonely, long, sad years. You can't even stay long enough to ask how we've been? How Dawn is? Have you changed that much? Do you care so little?"

He stiffened, hands curling into hard fists, fingernails digging deep into palms. He tilted his face to the sky, the tendons in his neck stretched taut, jaw clenched hard, eyes screwed shut, mouth open, soundless, and pain, pain flowing across his face.

"Spike." It was almost a whisper, then she cleared her throat. "You can't just run away... Again... I learnt that. From you. You _never_ ran away. Even when everyone around you told you to... Even when I did." Her voice was soft and low, sad, speaking a truth she'd never voiced before. "This is life, Spike. It's real, not some two dimensional tv show. It's in glorious three D and sometimes, it's not so glorious. But, it _is_ life and we've all got a responsibility to live it. _You_ taught me that too. Stay... Please... Talk to me... All those months, I wouldn't talk to you, even though you kept asking. I know how that feels, now."

Her breath hitched, a little. She'd been so angry to find him, was it only hours ago? So very angry. Now though, when he was about to run out of her life, again, before he'd even got back in it. The anger was gone as though it'd never been; replaced by fear. No, please. Life can't be this cruel. Please don't bring him back to me and then snatch him away, without giving me a chance.

She shook her head, lifted it, stuck out her chin and placed her hands on her hips. "_You_ know what? Forget it! You're not interested. I can see that. I guess dieing a couple of times and putting a few years in, _some where else_, does change things. I can see you don't care. So, just go back to whatever it is you've been doing and I'll just get back to my life. Which, for your information, buster, has been damned good. I'd tell you about it, if I thought you'd give a damn."

He'd smelt her tears building and he knew the minute she'd steeled herself, pulled back and put up her shields. He lowered his head as she spat out the last, raised a hand to wipe across his face, before he turned to her, as she finished.

"It's not true." His voice was hoarse, ragged, soft.

"What? Did you say something, you coward?"

Blue eyes burned into hers, bright, wet. The lights of the car park made a halo around his head, as he looked down at her.

"I do care, Buffy." He swallowed. "Couldn't stop caring even if I wanted to. 'S just... 'S hard, isn't it? Not sure where I belong." He took another swallow, looked round them, then back at her. Shining, as always. "It's been so long. Expected you had your life now. No place for a multi times resurrected whatever I am. Went to Angel, for help. He, he gave me a place. Twice. A place I fit, at least, a little."

Her heart broke at that. They'd never really let him in. _She_ hadn't let him in. Not until right at the end. Even then, she'd held him off. Too busy, too sad, too scared. Used him, abused him. Never gave him a place. They'd all been too young, too selfish. So brash and secure in their own knowledge and beliefs. So very black and white. So very young and so very unknowing. She sighed. Life was just too complicated! Another sigh.

Then, a small crinkle of a smile played along her lips.

"Wanna go kill something? I know a place..."

He laughed. A deep, soulful laugh.

"We can take my bike. You have the helmet."


	4. Chapter 4 - Days of Our Unlives

They wandered through the cemetery, side by side, keeping a look out for fresh graves or anything else that might be about at that time of the night. So far their night of killing had consisted of chasing off an attempted mugger and chastising the young girl for being out in a dark alley this late at night.

"So, what's with the check-out job?"

"It pays the bills. Vamp's gotta eat, gotta live somewhere. Bit past the slumming it in a crypt thing. Like some comforts. Not a lot of call for unskilled workers, with no resume."

"I guess. Though I think you're being a bit harsh. You'd fixed the Restfield crypt up pretty good, really."

Spike snorted. "The bedroom was a hole in the ground with a coffin poking out of the wall."

"Well yeah, but the bed was comfy and the rugs were nice."

"If I recollect properly, we didn't make much use of the bed."

She blushed and even in the dim light she knew he'd see the red of her cheeks, smell the blood pooling under her skin.

"Yeah. So how come the market? You never struck me as the check-out chick, er, person, sort. More like a bouncer or something."

He shrugged his shoulders. "It's Angel's. He offered, back when I first... back when. Somewhere to get a start."

"What? Angel owns a supermarket?"

"Angel and Nina. Own a chain of them, actually."

"Holy cow. Angel the retailer. I never knew."

"So, you keep in touch with him, then?"

"Well, when we want some intel around here, we do. I just never asked what he did now. I suppose I must have known he had to do something to support his family."

"Yeah. Should've known wolf girl would be a good breeding bitch."

"Spike! That's a bit rude isn't it? Besides aren't they like your nieces and nephews or cousins or something,"

There was a pained look on his face for a minute, before he shrugged. "Since Angel, or rather Angelus, was my grand sire, then they'd technically be me uncle and aunties."

Buffy looked at him incredulously, then burst into laughter.

"'S not that funny, slay... er Buffy."

"Oh, it's funny alright. Hilarious. So you and Angel get on alright then?"

"Well, about the same as always I suppose. Course we can't fight like we used to, him being human and all. We have our moments though. Nina usually kicks us out, tells us to take our unlife business elsewhere."

"Unlife business?"

"Yeah, or vampire shit, if she's in a mood."

"So, do you still do a bit of demon fighting?"

"Truth be told, not a lot of it about here. Which you'd know if you'd been here any sort of time. Planning on staying around these parts?"

"Don't know yet. Giles' found a prophecy."

"Oh hell! Course it's a prophecy." He kicked at a headstone. Then bent and set it to rights. Buffy just looked at it a moment and frowned.

"So, um, how long have you been with Angel?"

"A few months, give or take."

"Oh, not long then."

"Think I see something over by that big mausoleum. Gonna go take a look." With that he was off, disappearing into the shadows before she'd even registered which direction he was headed in. Buffy looked around but didn't see anything. She wasn't getting any tinglies though, so no vampires about. In fact, no vampires at all. She heard a noise and looked up to see Spike coming back to her.

"Was nothing. Probably a cat or something. Must be getting late. Might call it a night, I think."

"So, you going to ask a girl back for a night cap?"

"Don't think that'd be wise, Buffy."

"Why not? Unless, I mean. Sorry I just assumed, I mean... um..." She looked perplexed.

"Spit it out s..Buffy."

"Unless you have a girlfriend, or something."

"Actually, I do have a roomie."

"Oh." Her heart just fell into her boots.

"Yeah. That fella at the store, Mike. We share one of Angel's condos."

"He has property too?"

"Apparently he socked a bit away before we took on the Wolf, the Ram and the Heart. Always been careful with his investments. Took good care of the Aurelius fortune, while he was head of the family."

"Wait, you mean all that time I was working at the Doublemeat Palace and trying to find the money for copper pipe, Angel had money?"

"Well, yeah. Not like he could just spend it though. Lot of rules and stuff associated with it. Course now that Dru is head of the family..."

"What? You're crazy ho of an ex is head of your vampire family?"

"Dru is my sire and no, just teasing. No, old bat face had quite the family. Not sure how Angelus ever got his big mitts on the family title but that went by the bye when he got all soul having."

"So you and she, haven't been, um, together?"

He just looked at her. "Buffy, I've still got me soul. I'm still a demon pariah. Least in some circles. To finish the story, Angel didn't have access to the family fortune, though he did have access to his share through Darla."

"God. It's like days of our lives. Tune into the unlife streaming story of the Vampire from LA. Except of course now, it's here."

"Yeah. Right little soap we'd make. Life is stranger than fiction."

"So, Mike would be at home now?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. You could come back to my place, except I'm sharing with Dawn and her family."

"Niblet has a family?"

"Didn't Angel mention it?"

"Didn't ask, I guess."

"Oh. Spike?"

"Hmmm?"

"Never mind. Dawn's married, got a little boy and is due to have another baby in a couple of weeks."

"Oh. Right. Hard to think of her as anything but that annoying little teenage sis. Grown woman now, of course. Missed a lot haven't I?"

"Yeah, you have. I'm Aunt Buffy."


	5. Chapter 5 - Family Relations

"Do you really have to go, Spike?"

"What'd you have in mind, Buffy."

"Since we can't go back to our places, I guess, maybe, do what we originally planned? Denny's?"

Spike smiled. A genuine smile that lit his face. She longed to reach up and caress it, let her hand lie gentle along the smooth, cool skin that she knew, would feel like silk beneath her fingers.

"Sure." He looked down at her. "You can tell me about Niblet and what it's like to be an aunt." And maybe, she thought, you'll tell me. where you've been. She wouldn't ask, she'd decided. She was afraid he'd leave and she wasn't ready for him to not be there.

They made their way back to the bike and then on to Denny's. He held the door for her, that little smile that made her loins ache, playing across his lips. She led the way to a corner booth and slid in behind the table. He slipped onto the seat beside her, picking up the menu as he did so.

"Do you want me to order for you, Buffy?" Every time he said her name, her heart twisted a little more.

"Okay." She watched as the waitress approached their table. Saw the minute the woman noticed him, saw her straighten, reach up to pat her hair, fix a smile on her face. He never failed to impress the women, even when he was drunk. Even when he was evil, she thought, and shook her head.

He ordered banana pecan pancakes for her, with a diet coke, hot chocolate and onion rings for himself. The waitress brought the food with the same come hither smile, eyes only for Spike. He smiled politely, nodded his thanks, barely glancing at her.

Buffy attacked the pancakes with relish. Patrolling always made her hungry. Spike leaned back into the soft, red padding of the booth, and watched her eat.

"So, who's the lucky man who captured our Dawn's heart, then?"

Buffy took a sip of her drink

"Well, actually, it's Xander." She watched him start, expressionless, then he laughed.

"Should've known. After all he was her first crush. Like high school sweethearts, isn't it? Could've done worse, both of them. Had such fun baiting him, when he first had the pleasure of hosting my company. Course, I wasn't too happy back then. Newly chipped, outcast from my kind, a master reduced to a beggar."

"Looking back, I can see how hard it must've been for you, to come to us. The enemy. I saw just another vampire. Something I was supposed to kill. Not make deals with. Except, I already had, once."

He snorted. "Yeah. Not the warmest welcome. Expected worse, really. Surprised you lot let me in. I expected to just get staked, good and proper. Still, you don't get to survive for a century or more, if you can't learn to compromise, adapt." He shrugged. "How's Xander these days? What's he doing to pass the time?"

"He's good. He spent a few years in Africa, gathering in slayers that had been called by Willow's spell. Then he came back to join us in Scotland. He helped train the slayers, oversaw the maintenance of the castle and helped with the more troublesome girls. He's actually a pretty good counselor. They seem to like confiding in him and he's very good at knowing what to say to them."

"Well, he did always seem to find a way to inject a bit of humour into a situation, back in the day."

She smiled in memory. "Yeah, he did at that. Dawnie finished college with a degree in ancient languages."

"Always knew she had the smarts." He smiled at memories of a girl he'd considered a little sister.

"She joined the Council as a researcher. She's one of our top language experts. Human and demon."

He shook his head. "And a mother, now. Hard to think of my little bit having her own."

"She's a wonderful mother. She's so like mom, it's scary sometimes. Don't know how she got to be so wise. Billy, he's four now, he's so clever and a good kid. He does get himself into a heap of mischief though. Bit like his name sake, really." She smiled at this.

"Oh, who'd that be then?"

"His name is William."

She watched the eyebrow lift, then the blue eyes widen in disbelief. "No," he choked out, "really?" Then that shit eating grin he wore so well, beamed back at her.

"Yes, really. His dad likes to tell him a story about his namesake, a man who saved the world. Who stood alone, in the end, and gave his life so that we could all live ours." She reached across the table to take his hand. He looked down at their joined hands. A little shy smile played across his face as he looked up into hers. He reached with his other hand to take a stray lock of her hair and move it across her brow.

"Still golden." He murmured. Her eyes closed. He breathed in her scent. Sunlight, as always. He sighed and pulled back.

"So, she's ready to pop again, is she?"

"Figuratively and literally." She laughed, her eyes crinkling at the corners. "She's as big as a house and moody as anything. Eats like a horse. She's due in two weeks."

Spike shook his head. Dawn a mother and Xander her husband and father to her children.

"And you, Buffy? Is there... someone in your life?"


	6. Chapter 6 - Remember the Heat

"Angel, it's Dawn again. I can't believe you haven't rung me back. Where are you? I've been trying to get hold of Buffy and she isn't answering either. What's the point of you people having a mobile phone if you don't answer it or return calls? Honestly! Don't make me come over there, 'cos you won't like an overtired pregnant lady beating on you."

...

"Um... I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back. Maybe order me a hot chocolate, please."

Spike looked across at her and nodded. "Sure thing, Buffy."

She slid out from the table and walked toward the back of the restaurant. Spike admired the rear view as she walked away from him. He thought of the number of times he'd had that same view, over the years he'd known her. Her turning her back to him and walking away; leaving him; running from him. Even when she was with him, she hadn't really been _with him_.

He shouldn't have asked if she was with anyone. That was stupid. He'd promised himself, he wouldn't ask that. He'd wait until she volunteered the information herself. Stupid, stupid, impatient sod that he was. Never could wait. Never could follow the plan. Was his undoing, time after time. If she ran, he'd let her go. Only right.

He pulled his phone out to try the great poof again. He needed some help here. Why did he get sent back with no information? He was flying blind here. Wasn't sure if he wasn't better off where he'd been. He pressed the numbers, listened to it ring. Bloody sod, never answered the bloody thing when you wanted him.

"Angel, it's me, ya pillock. Agh. What's the point? I'll tweet ya a piccie of the two of us when she gets back. Maybe I'll Instagram you a quick vid, if you're lucky, forehead."

...

"Dawnie, it's me, returning your call. Everything's fine. I just needed to work some excess energy off, keep my hand in. Not that there seems to be much that needs killing in this town. Well, I'll see you in the morning. Bye."

"Angel, it's Buffy. We're at the Denny's up the road from Spike's work. Ring me back!"

Damn! What's the point of these stupid phones? So many ways to keep in touch these days but when it comes down to it, you never can talk to someone when you need to. Oh well, time to face the music. She washed her hands, stared at herself in the mirror for a minute, decided what the heck, she looked just fine. She left the bathroom.

...

Spike looked up as Buffy came out of the ladies. She wasn't looking his way and he studied her as she came towards him. Ten years sat well on her. She didn't look any older really, than the last time he'd seen her. Put a few pounds on, thank goodness; looked more at ease with herself; happy, content with her life. He sighed. Maybe his plan to stay away from her had been the right one. She looked up at him and then that smile that always took his breath away lit her face. He smiled back as she slid back into the seat beside him.

"Miss me? This my hot chocolate?" She picked up the mug and took a sip, ending up with a chocolate moustache.

"Hey, that's mine. Yours is coming. Even asked for the little marshmallows, like your mum used to do." The smile that was on his face came out in his voice. He still loved this girl more than anything. He'd found himself, somewhat, during that year in LA, with Angel and his humans. He'd been accepted as part of the team; been his own man; played with the white hats on his own terms, for his own reasons. Yeah, he'd wanted to go to her but he needed to do something for himself more.

He'd believed she'd meant it when she'd told him, down there in the hell mouth. He'd seen the moment the truth of it had shone in her eyes, felt it in her soul when they'd joined hands. But he'd needed the time to once again reinvent himself; make peace with his soul; become whole again. He'd needed to find himself before he could find the girl and see if they had a future together. He hadn't made it out of the alley.

Nine years, after another not quite final death, sent back from a sort of peace, to once again play the part of pawn to the Powers that wank. He'd made a promise, had a mission to fulfill. None of it made a difference. He was still love's bitch and his heart belonged to this tiny woman. She was his light, his sun, his reason for being.

She took another sip. "Possession is nine tenths of the law, you know." She licked her lips, the tiny, pink tongue dragging across that lush bottom lip, round and across the sweet bow of her top lip. He wanted to lean across and run his tongue around those lips, suck that tongue into his mouth. He wanted to ask her again was there anyone in her life. He wanted.

"You haven't eaten anything, Spike. Do you still eat people food?" She pushed his onion rings around, picked one up, put it in her mouth, bit it and chewed. He watched her mouth move. He was hard, watching her mouth. His too tight jeans pressed against him, made him shift uncomfortably on the seat.

"So where have you been, Spike?" She sucked the rest of the onion into her mouth. He forgot his discomfort. He forgot what words he'd thought of. He forgot about everything but her mouth. And the heat he'd felt as his soul burned and she'd held his hand.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7 - Time Past

They sat staring at each other across his plate of cold onion rings, her scraped clean plate, the mug, and glass and felt the fire building. Like wild fire racing through their blood, bringing a flush of pink to her face; making him feel as though, at any moment, his heart would beat again.

"Hot chocolate?" The waitress shook her head. Lucky cow to have someone who looked like that, staring like _that_ at her. She put the mug on the table between them and left them to it.

"Uh, thanks." He said it automatically without shifting his gaze from the face of light in front of him. He leant forward and reached his hand toward where hers rested on the table surface, clasped it in his; ran his thumb back and forth across it, savouring the feel, the connection. She looked down, mesmerised by the movement, felt the heat building in her palm and flow along her fingers.

"So, are you going to tell me where you've been for the last nine years?" She looked up and gazed into blue so bright, so deep, she felt instantly as though she were drowning and almost gasped for air, in reflex. He leaned back against the padding of the booth, shifted in his seat. His eyes withdrew a little, searching an inner space, sorting through memories to find the words he wanted to say. Instead he sighed, went for the short version, filtered; not lies, exactly; not all the truth. Not yet.

"Died, again. Didn't take, again. Ended up here, of all places. Hard to think it was just coincidence, I should end up in the same city that Angel moved to. Didn't rightly know who I was, for a bit. Himself and wolf girl found me, bit out of it, in an empty warehouse they were looking at buying. Took me home, took care of me till I figured things. Been working for them ever since. That's about it. Don't know where I was before then. Don't think I want to know."

She watched his mouth move, recognised the words, took them in but they weren't registering. Her tongue ran along her bottom lip, looking for the long ago remembered taste of his. She caught glimpses of his tongue, between white teeth, as he talked; moist, glistening. She felt again its soft caress inside her mouth, the shiver that always ran through her body as it licked the roof, and then curled around her tongue. No-one had ever played her body like he did. No-one danced as he had.

His thumb had continued its circling path across the back of her hand as he'd talked. The vibrations that had begun as a slight tingle, built into a warm flush, had grown into a searing heat that flicked along her hand like flames. Made her remember the last time she'd held that hand in her hers; when at last they'd connected. She turned her hand inside his and clasped it, lifted it to her lips and kissed his knuckles. Her eyes closed as she moved her head to run her cheek along them, mouth open as she let the feelings inside her, out.

Pictures flashed through her head; her hand reaching out to a white chest, scored deep with red, angry cuts; that chest, blue clad, standing in her lounge room door; that chest, bare and bright in the dim light of a shadowed church, heaving with emotion; that chest bare again, cut deep again, held against hard rock walls; that chest, black clad, wrapping around her, holding her, strengthening her; that chest, dazzling bright as her medallion began to burn his soul.

She raised her head, eyes searching his. "I've missed you, Spike." A tiny smile flicked across her face. "Don't get me wrong; I've dated; had an affair or two. Thought I'd found someone, once or twice, that maybe I could spend my life with. But, they were never you, William." She raised her hand when she thought he was going to say something. "I've had a good life. I've been happy. If... if I'd have really loved someone, I'd have settled down with them."

She smiled at herself as she said this. She knew it was true. "I was so mad at you, when I found out you were in LA. With Angel. You know we came, after the battle started?" He shook his head. "Yep. Willow found out. Came back from some other dimension she'd been visiting; said we all had to hop it to LA 'cos there was a huge fight coming. You... you must have already been... I mean, no-one remembers seeing you at all, though of course it was chaos, what with all the demons of hell there."

She took a breath, remembering the sight that had greeted them; the tremble of fear that had gone through their little group before they steeled themselves to do what they did best. What they'd been called for. Slay. "We jumped in. I saw Angel dust. He was fighting the dragon. It got him when he got it. Anyway, we won. I went back to Scotland with most of the girls. Then we heard Angel came back human 'cos of some prophecy."

"Thought maybe you'd have been together." He said this sadly, hesitantly, a flicker of jealousy pushing through.

"No. He did come to see me. But he had Nina with him. He, he was happy and you know, it didn't hurt. I was happy for him, for them." She looked down at her hands that smile playing on her lips. "Our time had passed. Like I'd thought our time, yours and mine, Spike, was past." She looked up again, to search his face, looking for a sign that maybe, just maybe their time had come again. He however was looking past her, over her head, his lips pursed in that way he had, when something had gone wrong. She realised someone was blocking the light.

"Angel."

TBC


	8. Chapter 8 - Secrets Kept

"God, not now Peaches. Your bloody timing is as ever, just perfect!" Spike snarled.

"You called me, Spike!"

"Angel? Angel!" Buffy sprang up from the table in a blur of speed. "You lying, sanctimonious, deciding what's best for other people, asshole! I told you last time you did this to me I wouldn't be held responsible for my actions. I told you what I'd do to you if you ever played godfather with my life again. You just couldn't help yourself, could you? Had to keep me and Spike apart. You've got a family and still you think you know what's best for me."

She poked him in the chest on each sentence. She was beside herself with anger, though she wasn't sure if it was for the reasons she stated or because he'd just interrupted confessing Buffy who was finally getting stuff off her chest that had been laying inside her since the last year of the hellmouth. Things that she'd pushed down. Things that had pushed their way out in those few final moments when she'd held Spike's hand; when it had all been too late. Things she'd had to push down again; put aside when she'd got out and Spike hadn't. Now, tonight, she was on a trail of self-discovery, finding out where she and Spike might meet. She was baring her soul and asking him to bare his. She was tasting a life she thought she could never have.

"Buffy." Angel raised his hands in surrender, stepping back under the onslaught of a pissed off Slayer, intent on putting the boot in. Why had he listened to his messages? Why had he come here? Nina had told him to leave it till tomorrow. Let things cool off. Find out what the story was. But he hadn't been able to. God, would he never learn to stay out of this girl's, this woman's, life?

"Buffy." Spike had slid out behind her and now stood at her back. He rested his hands on her shoulders. "Slayer. Don't blame the poof."

"Why, why shouldn't I, Spike?"

"Buffy, I asked him, I mean, I... I was sent back and I wasn't myself for a while. I told you that."

"What, you didn't know who you were but you somehow remembered me and asked him not to tell me about you?"

"Well, not exactly. No"

"Well, what exactly then. When did you come back this time?"

"A couple of months back. Maybe. Not sure." He looked to Angel.

"Buffy. We found Spike in an abandoned warehouse. He wasn't good. He didn't know who or what he was for a while."

"Yeah, he just told me that. So how long was a while?" She looked up into those big brown eyes she used to lose herself in. Now all she could see was betrayal. Again. He still saw her as the sixteen year old girl, he'd first seen all those years ago in Los Angeles.

"Look, maybe we should sit down. Or take this someplace else." Angel looked around to see who else was in the restaurant. There was an old couple sitting up near the door. Two staff were behind the counter, watching them. One of them had a phone in her hand.

"I'm not going anywhere till you both come clean." She turned and sat back down in the seat she had vacated. Spike ran his hand through his hair in that achingly familiar way he had when he was not sure what he should do next. Angel just stared at some point over their heads. Then he motioned to Spike to slide into the booth and he sat on the end of the seat. He placed his hands on the table, clasping them together, looking at them as though he was studying an interesting text. Spike fiddled with the condiments, looking surreptitiously at Buffy from under his lashes.

"Well one of you had better start talking." She sat back against the red padded seat behind her and folded her arms.

"Well, as I said Nina and I were inspecting this empty warehouse over at the docks. Looking for storage near the port, for the supermarkets. You know a distribution centre. Good position, good size, great access. Nina's good at finding stuff like that. For the business. Got a good head on her for that sort of thing." He looked at Buffy when he felt her eyes burning into him. He cleared his throat. "Anyway, we found Spike. He was in a bit of a bad way. Seemed quite out of it. We realised he wasn't human. I wasn't sure about the soul at that point, so I kinda hit him over the head and knocked him out." Spike growled at this but didn't say anything. "Anyway, once we found out it was really him and he still had the soul and didn't seem intent on hurting anyone, we took him to one of our places and got him settled."

"How long?"

"Six months now, I guess."

"Six months and you couldn't pick up a phone? Just a quick word. Buffy, the love of your life is back. Buffy, the vampire who died for you, then came back and died for the world, AGAIN, is back. Buffy the man you've been mourning is here in my home?" She stopped, drew breath and tried to get herself under control.

Angel shrugged. It'd made sense back then to keep Buffy out of it, but now, he couldn't quite make it fit. Spike stared at Buffy, wonder on his face, at her words. He was as guilty as Angel. He should've called her, soon as his marbles lined up again. Knew it. Couldn't believe he'd made the same mistake again! Couldn't understand why he'd listened to this human version of his sire.

"Sorry, luv. I'm a coward. I shoulda called you soon as I came to me senses."

"Yes." She turned teary eyes to him. "Yes, you should have Spike."


	9. Chapter 9 - Grown-ups

"You know what?" She slid out from the booth and stood at the end of the table looking at Spike, "I have to go. Dawn's at home, by herself, and she's due any day now. So, um, I've got things to think about."

"Buffy, please. I'm... I'm sorry for being an idiot, again. I'm sorry..." Spike was looking up at her, pain running across his face.

"You _have_ been an idiot, Spike. _Again_. I don't know what to say right now. It's late. Maybe I'll see you around. Sometime." She stared into that face she'd thought she'd never see again; saw the heat rising in his eyes as he looked up at her, just a little heat on this cold day. She knew that if she leant across the table, got in his face, his tongue would snake out, wet and glistening and he'd moan, just a little, in the back of his throat. His eyes would get that heavy lidded look that she'd thought of, back then, as his bedroom eyes; even when she'd been busy hating him and herself, for what they were doing.

"You know what? We're all grown-ups here, or supposed to be. If you'd wanted to get in touch with me, Spike, you would have. The only reason I know you're back again, is stupid dumb luck. I guess you've moved on. I know I had. Probably should leave it at that. I'm sure one of you will get the bill. Thanks for the pancakes. See you around. Or not!" She turned, ready to storm out of the restaurant and out of his life, again, and ran into a solid black clad chest. Stupid vampire speed!

She looked up into his face, the face that had filled so many of her dreams, over the past ten years. Nightly for a long time, not so much lately, but often enough, that she still knew every bit of it, intimately. His bottom lip disappeared behind his teeth as he looked into her eyes, his nostrils flaring gently. She groaned softly, felt little tendrils of fire race through her veins.

"Two idiots don't make a happily ever after, Spike." She snorted as she said it. Like they were ever going to get a happy ever after; took her courage in her hands, squared her shoulders. "I'm willing to give it a try, though. If you are." She leant into him and up, towards his lips. His eyes opened a little more; crinkling at the corners; flashing brilliant blue at her. The lip came out and so did his tongue, as his eyelids dropped over darkening irises. She groaned again and almost missed his moan. Oh yeah, he was still hers. She stepped into him and his arms came up to circle her body, as his head came down towards hers; his lips parting just a little as they whispered her name.

"Dawn's been calling me, Buffy. She sounded pretty mad. I rang her back, told her I was going to see if you were still here. Said I'd ring her back." Buffy sighed, turned her head toward the annoying voice and saw Angel looking up at her, at them. He had that stupid, sheepish look of guilt flicking across his face. So predictable. He's the arsehole in all this and she's supposed to melt at his puppy dog look and forgive him. As if!

"I already rang Dawn and left a message. Before you interrupted our night." She dropped her hands from Spike and turned to glare at the man still sitting at the table. "I do recall that I made a promise, when I left a message on your phone, Angel. A fairly specific promise." She looked back at Spike, gave him an apologetic smile before turning to look down at Angel, again, rather enjoying being the one doing that, for a change. "If I were you, I'd back away now and go home to your wife and family. Before I become a very pissed off slayer and forget that you're not the vamp you used to be." She glared at him, anger at his duplicity running like fire through her veins. And there's a big word in her vocabulary that he put there.

"Um, er, Buffy.."

"Don't whine, Angel. You're older than dirt, it's time you learned to act like it. Or at least, like a grown-up. You've got your own family. Stop trying to do what you think is best for me and mine. I'm not sixteen anymore. Haven't been for a long time. I'd have thought you'd ve noticed that by now and noticed how much I hate people telling me how to live my life and doing things for my own good. I will do what's good for me. Even if it isn't sometimes. I'll make that decision and I'll deal with what happens. Now, run along home to Nina and let me and Spike get back to what we were doing. What I decided I want to do. For me." She stared at Angel for a little longer, until he dropped his eyes.

"Fine. You're right. You're a grown woman. It's just I thought you should know why he is back..."

"Not now Angel. Spike's a grown man, er, vampire. He can tell me what he wants to, when he wants to. We're two grown-ups that can talk for ourselves without someone deciding what we need or don't need to hear. Go home, Angel. While you still can!" She turned back to Spike, a smile playing on her lips. It felt good to put Angel in his place but she knew something that would feel even better. She stepped back into those cool, strong arms that had only held in her dreams, for far too long. Cool, surprisingly soft, lips descended onto hers and she went up on her toes as she pressed into them; felt the arms she'd missed forever, envelope her. Felt...

"Spike! Spike! You bastard!" Damn! Dawn!


	10. Chapter 10 - Penance

Buffy looked over Spike's shoulder into the angry eyes of her sister. Spike dropped his arms and turned to look at the fuming, heavily pregnant woman, standing in the aisle. Same long brown hair, same pixie shaped chin and big luminous eyes. Angry and hurt eyes, right at this moment. He could smell her anger and he could also smell the tears that weren't far away.

"Language, Dawnie. And what are you doing here at this time of night? You should be home. Asleep."

"Well, I would be if someone had told me what'd crawled up her butt and died. I was worried about you. You were so mad when you went out, threatening Angel and mumbling insanely to yourself."

"I called you a little while ago and told you I was fine."

"Yeah well, I knew something was wrong, especially when the great forehead finally called me back and was all evasive."

Spike snickered at his Bit, using one of his nick-names, for Angel. It was a mistake. It drew her attention back to him.

"You're a jerk, Spike. A big fat stupid jerk. A yo-yo of a jerk. The King-Kong of jerks!"

"Well, I see that fancy education you're sis's been telling me you have, has done wonders for your vocabulary." He gave a nervous little smile, scrubbed his hand through his hair and scuffed his boots on the floor. He'd been well and truly caught with his hand in the cookie jar and even if Buffy had been about to forgive him, he reckoned no way was this strong, beautiful woman standing in front of him, about to do the same.

"You!... You don't get to make smart-ass remarks. How can someone who so used to be my best friend, be so stupid and cruel? You don't get to say anything but sorry." Her lip quivered. "Sorry for dying a second time before we even knew you'd been back and sorry for not telling us you're not dead, again! Or undead, or..." She stepped forward and touched his face, felt the smooth, coolness of a vampire's skin. Her vampire's skin. Or at least, he had been, back before all the horror had descended on them, in Sunnydale. For a moment they stood looking into each other's eyes, then Dawn drew a foot back and kicked him in the shin. "Jerk! Undead, selfish jerk!" Tears were sliding down her face, dripping off her chin. "And don't think I'm crying for you. I can't help it. Stupid pregnancy hormones. Stupid vampire!"

Buffy moved to Dawn's side and led her back to the table, pushing her down into the seat. "One of you, please, get her some water." Spike jerked around and moved to the counter to obey. This was sure turning into one hell of a night. Out of the fry-pan and into the fire. One minute burning with desire and now burning with shame at having caused his Niblet such pain. What was the point of his having given up so much to fight for his soul, if all it did was let him keep making stupid mistakes and hurting the ones he loved?

His hand shook as he carried the glass of water back to the table. He looked at the man who used to be his sire, his lord and master, his everything and saw that there were no answers there. Angel had stood up when Dawn had descended on them, but he stood at the end of the table, mouth open, like a fish out of water gasping for air. Spike realised that humanity had dulled more than his sire's physical senses. Suddenly, he felt more alone than he ever had, even back in Sunnydale, when the initiative had stolen his very existence, taken who and what he'd been and left him broken and lost, to grovel at the feet of his enemy.

He put the glass on the table in front of Dawn and turned. A hand shot out and grasped his arm and he looked up into the grey green eyes of the woman he'd more than once, sacrificed everything for; the woman he still loved. She looked at him, one eyebrow rising in question. Are you running again? He heard it as clearly as if she'd spoken it. Was he? Is that what he'd died and died again for? To run from his responsibilities. Because these women were his responsibility. They'd taken him into their lives when he didn't deserve any such kindness. Especially Dawn.

He crouched down at the end of the table, reached for Dawn's hand, pulled his hand back ran it behind his head.

"Um, Dawn, I er... well you have every right to be mad at me. I.. you were more than a friend to me, back at Sunnydale, and I know we didn't part on good terms and well, I figure you've forgiven me for things I did back then, with naming your son after me and all." He paused and reached out to cup her chin and lift her head up. "I had me reasons for LA. I'm sorry, though, that I hurt you so much and I can see I did. I thought maybe you'd have moved on. Guess there's still too much of the demon in me, to understand things like that. But, I am sorry Dawn, for what I did and for staying away."

"Yeah, well you owe me, big time." She sniffed. "You do know that, don't you? I think about a thousand hours of baby-sitting, for starters. And you have to make friends with my husband." She saw the frown start on his forehead. "No arguments. You don't argue with pregnant ladies, in case that's something else your demon doesn't know. And I just bet Angel thought it would be best to keep this recent return a big secret. Please tell me it was recent, right? You haven't been hiding from us for years?"

"No, Bit, promise. It..."

"Angel?"

"Nina!"


	11. Chapter 11 - No More Secrets

Angel cast a guilty look toward his wife, where she stood, just inside the restaurant door, hands on hips, lips pursed. "You didn't have to come here. I, I was just about ready to leave."

"Dawn's husband phoned, looking for her. I said I'd no idea where she would be but that there seemed to be some sort of gathering going on here and I would go have a look for him."

"Oh, is he home already?"

"I believe so, Dawn. He said no-one was there and neither you nor your sister was answering your phones. He rang to see if Angel knew anything."

"Oh right. I guess it must be later than I thought or earlier or..."

"You'd better ring him, Dawn. He's worried about you. And I can see why." Nina ran an appraising look over Dawn, before she tuned to Angel. "What is going on here, Angel? Next time you go storming off take your phone!"

"Um, Nina, I just... that is... They rang me!" He flung his arm around to indicate the other three behind him.

"Oh. Hi Nina. How are you? I'm sorry we've made you come out so late. Guess I should've left it till tomorrow to speak to Angel. Or at least until after I talked to Spike. It's all been a bit unexpected really. Bit of a shock to the system to find out someone you've been missing, isn't missing at all, or that is, well you know."

"I think I do know, Buffy. I'm sorry you had to find out the way you did. I know Spike'd be sorry to have hurt you. He told me, well... I'll let him tell you what he thinks he ought to." She looked past Buffy toward Dawn who was searching in her handbag, presumably for her phone. "If you haven't got your phone, Dawn, you can borrow mine."

"Oh thanks, Nina. Sorry, and um, hi. Thanks for bringing me the message. I seemed to have left my phone behind. I was worried about Buffy and I just knew Angel was keeping something important from us and, I guess I had a sneaking hope that, well... I missed Spike terribly after Sunnydale. I felt really bad because I never got to say I still cared and then he was gone. I was so mad the second time." She looked up at the vampire. "Not just for me. Buffy'd been moving on and well she... it was hard, you know. Unfair and really hard." A tear slipped down her face and Buffy knelt down beside her and pulled her into a hug.

Nina turned to look at Spike. "Spike, you okay?" He stood, looking down at the two sisters, so much pain across his face. Angel had told her of the poet, William, Drusilla had dragged home and she could see that he was still very much a part of the creature that was Spike. The vampire had brought complications into her family's lives and she'd not been pleased. He'd been so lost, when they'd found him. He'd been Angel's family and family was important to Nina, so she'd accepted him, taken him under her wing, as he'd struggled to come back to life.

She hadn't wanted to be part of the strange world Angel had inhabited when he was a vampire, but, since she herself had become an unwilling part of it, in a very real and violent way, she'd accepted that it would continue to hover at the edges of their lives. The occasional visits from a slayer or a watcher, sometimes Buffy and her family, were an accepted part of their life. When Spike turned up however, she'd a feeling things were about to get complicated. Especially when her dope of a husband wanted to play secrets.

Spike sighed and got a grip on himself. He smiled at her. "Fine, Nina, thanks. 'M sorry, luv. The poof... Angel's right. 'S my fault. I did ring him. Panicked, yeah? 'Course it kinda snowballed a bit from there. Know I've been a bother to you, since I came back. Never could get it right. Never follow a plan."

Nina took his hand. "It's okay Spike. Some plans aren't worth following and I know a little bit about coping with sudden life changes." She smiled. She still remembered acutely, the shock of becoming a werewolf. She also remembered the kindness and help of Angel and his little band. They'd rescued her, got her through; helped her accept her new life and move on. "I'm glad I've been able to help you a little. You know that, right?"

"You've been amazing, pet. Couldn't have done it without you. It's been a godsend being part of your family; accepted." He lifted her hand to his lips.

"Even if some of us make stupid decisions on behalf of others. What were you thinking Angel?" She fixed her gaze on Angel.

"Well, I didn't know Buffy and Dawn were back in the States. No-one tells me anything." He all but pouted.

"Pot, kettle!" Buffy glared at him as she stood up again. She'd been looking at Spike's hand in Nina's and trying to push down the rising desire to shove the woman away from her vampire. She felt heat filling her cheeks. She so needed to hit someone or something. She was blushing like a giddy, jealous teenager. For the first time, she really wished Angel was still a vampire!

"You okay Buffy? You look a little hot and bothered." Spike looked at her with that damn eyebrow lift.

"Don't you start, Spikie, 'cos I haven't forgotten where your nose is and that you so need to do about a decade of groveling for your part in all this."

"Um, ah... Slayer. There's no need..."

"Buffster! There you are. Me and the g-man have been hunting the town for you. Where's my girl?"

"Ah, Buffy, my dear, I... Good grief! Spike!"

"Bugger, now all the movers and shakers are here."


	12. Chapter 12 - Letting Go

"Where's William, Xan?"

"Dawn, you're here. We left Billy at Angel's. Hope that's okay, Nina. Sally suggested it."

"Absolutely. Much better than toting the poor little thing around the country."

"Who's Sally?"

"She's our au pair, Dawn. She's very good. Couldn't manage our little hellions without her."

"So, Spike? I mean, it is you, right? Dead boy junior returned?"

"Clever as ever, donut.."

Dawn coughed loudly.

"I mean, yeah, it's me, Xander. Hope you're looking after my Nib... er, Dawn."

"Love of my life and mother of the light of my life."

"Heard you're a dad now. Knew you had it in you. Proof is in the puddin' so to speak. Understand the little fella's a bit of a handful."

"Billy does add spice to our lives. Probably shouldn't have named him after the poster child for ADD." Xander smiled at his wife, still seated at the table beside Buffy. "Everything okay, Dawn?"

"I'm fine, Xan. It's just been a long night."

"Yes, well, I'm sure we're all glad everything seems to be okay. I must say it is a bit of a shock to see you again, Spike. Though you have a habit of not staying dead, I suppose. Are you still a vampire?"

"I'm not a real boy, like Angel, if that's what you're asking, Rupert. Still sup the red stuff. Still got my soul, before you go gettin' all stake happy."

"I see. Well, perhaps, as we're all here we could maybe order some tea. It's been a long night of travel for us and my internal clock is playing havoc so I'm not the least bit sleepy. Maybe a spot of breakfast is in order?"

"It's probably about the time we get up anyway, Mr Giles. I'd second that."

"Please, Nina. I've asked you before. Call me Giles. I know I'm usually the harbinger of bad news on the few occasions I visit you and Angel but I do think of you as family."

"Sorry, of course, Giles."

"Hey, Giles, Xan. Long time no see."

"Very funny Buff. I think we'll need to move the party to another table. Let me help you up, Dawnie." Xander reached for Dawn's hand as he surveyed a room for a better table. "I sure could go a stack, maybe some bacon and I'd kill for a coffee." Dawn smiled up at her husband. Same old Xander. Didn't matter what was thrown at him, his thoughts turned to food and humour.

The gang moved to the new table across the room, leaving Angel and Spike standing beside the old one.

"Look, Spike. I'm sorry I seemed to have got this wrong, again. You know I always only want what's best for Buffy and we don't really understand the full implications of your return. I mean you said the Powers made a deal and sent you back, but you haven't been clear on what the deal is really."

Spike sighed and ducked his head. He wasn't sure what to say at this point. He'd planned this time, not to make the same mistakes. He'd been going to see what Buffy and Dawn were up to. Soon as he found out just exactly what he was up against, in his deal with the PTB. They hadn't answered him when he'd asked after the Slayer, in fact they hadn't answered any of his questions other than to say yes, he was needed in the world again and no, it was his decision. He could stay where he was, and it hadn't been that bad at all, or he could give it up and take his chances on coming back.

Why they'd chosen to send him back with a few screws loose, he'd no idea. Maybe it was a traumatic thing, coming back after decades in Purgatory. That he'd ended up with Angel could be no coincidence and he thought, maybe running into Buffy wasn't an accident either. He'd learnt over the century and a half of his earthly existence that there was seldom any such thing as coincidence.

"Liam, I don't understand why you still think you get to decide what's right for the girl. I sure don't give a fuck anymore what you think of me and my right to be with her. I'm not sure why I listened to you this time. But I did and I accept responsibility for it. Don't go telling me she deserves better than a vampire. I know it! But I love the chit. Love her more than my existence. Don't know rightly what I'm supposed to be doing here. The bloody powers that screw you, were pretty light on explanations, as always. But I do know, if she wants to be with me, than that's what I want. I'm sorry I called you. That was the old insecure Spike. The one you're unsouled self, had a major hand in making, I might add."

"Spike, listen..."

"Just shut it, 'Gelus. Yeah? I want this. It might be a recipe for disaster but the slayer's a grown woman and if she wants to give us a go, then I'm jumping feet first into the fire." He turned and strode after the others, leaving his former grandsire to follow, or not.

Angel stood, watching his former childe walk away from him. He saw Nina looking at him and he gave her a sheepish smile. Maybe it was time he stopped meddling. After all, he'd got the reward. He had the chance at redemption and he had the love of a beautiful, strong woman and a family of his own. He watched the smile grow on his wife's face as she looked at him; watched her walk to him and hold out her hand to him. He reached for her fingers and pulled her to him.

"Come on Liam. Time to let go some of your past, catch up with the present and just maybe, be part of their future. Wouldn't you agree?" She leaned up and kissed him.


	13. Chapter 13 - Thinky Thoughts

Buffy looked around the table at her 'family'. They were such a mixed bunch. How far she'd come from her childhood days of spoilt 'valley girl'. In her wildest dreams, she'd never have seen this. A watcher, a sister, a former mystical key, a former vampire, a werewolf and Xander. Dawn looked radiant chatting to Nina. Xander was still a surprise to her. She'd thought Dawn's crush on him way back in high school had been cute but she'd never pictured them together. True, Xan had been her best friend; helped get her through the change of school and circumstance; fought beside her through all of Sunnydale and beyond. He was Dawn's friend.

She'd been a bit worried when she finally realised that they were more than just hanging out as friends. Her worry had seen her talking with Dawn about it, in the usual round about fashion and even a chat with Giles. But when she saw how tender Xander was with Dawn, how he looked at her with that little bit of awe guys get, when they realise a hot girl likes them and how happy Dawn was, she realised she was more than okay with it. Besides, she'd messed up her own chance of love so much, she was no-one to be giving advice.

Giles was still mostly the same. Overbearing and stuffy, one minute, fatherly and caring the next. Their relationship had been strained after she'd found out about Spike having been in LA with Angel. Andrew had told Giles and together, they'd decided not to tell her. She'd had a yelling match with him, or more accurately, at him, because he hadn't really joined in. In fact, when she drew breath, he'd simply apologised, said he'd been wrong and that he was sorry. Took the wind right out of her rant. She'd been pretty good at secret keeping herself, in the past. To her own detriment. She forgave him and with mutual sighs of relief, they'd moved back to a comfortable relationship.

He doted on Billy, insisted on being grandpa. He'd never married, at least not yet, though she knew he occasionally had friends stay over. She snorted to herself, when the words 'orgasm friend' drifted through her head. Poor Anya. She'd really tried hard to fit in, be a human, after a thousand years of being a demon. They'd held a little memorial, each year, for those they'd lost closing the Sunnydale hellmouth. The ex-demon had proven herself in those last months and at the end had given her life. Buffy had felt ashamed she'd not cut the woman more slack and included her more and she'd felt extra guilty when they remembered her sacrifice. Not as guilty as she did about Spike though.

She looked across the table, at the vampire in question. She'd felt more than guilt for him. She still did. It was something else for a girl to find out how loved she could be. Back then it'd been scary because she hadn't known anyone could love as hard as Spike did. What he did for her. She shook her head at the thought. He'd completely changed himself, even before the soul, and that still just blew her mind, by himself. Oh sure the bit of plastic Riley's mob stuck in his brain started it, but he'd made that journey by his own choice and without anyone's help.

If she were honest, she couldn't blame them before Glory. He'd been one of the foulest vampires in history, had tried to kill them so it wasn't easy to believe he'd really changed. But, after what he did, for her, with Glory, and that summer she was gone. She sighed to herself. They'd treated him badly, after she was brought back. She'd been in a bad place and used him badly. It was all so awful. He did have blame in it too. He'd said as much to her. But she'd been the one with the soul. They all had. And he'd acted far better than any of them. He'd saved them all in the end.

She smiled as she watched him sitting beside Xander, talking quietly. She'd seen him and Angel having a quiet, serious few words before, as the rest of them had moved tables and for a minute she was worried they'd start fighting like they used to. But they didn't and Nina took Angel in hand and everyone just got on with the business of ordering food and she'd relaxed and joined in.

God, she so couldn't believe that even human, Angel still thought he had to take care of her, keep her in a gilded cage and protect her. If that's what he thought he'd been doing. Which, she supposed is exactly what he'd have been thinking. Though, watching him sitting there between his wife and Spike, she noticed the way he looked at the vampire from time to time. It was like a father looking at a son, just checking he was okay. When he looked at Nina, she could see he loved her and there was something of the same look on his face, when he looked at Spike. Maybe, he'd been trying to protect Spike as much as he thought he was protecting her.

A shiver went through her body. All these thinky thoughts of feelings and emotions. So not her thing. Maybe she was getting old. She was thirty after all. One thing she did know. Her family, this family sitting at the table around her, was something from the top shelf. They might argue and get hot under the collar but when it came down to it, when it was them against some big ugly or the next apocalypse, or anything life threw at them, they came together and stood as one. She was lucky to have that. She knew it. Now, it was time to bring the last member back to the fold.

"Oh thank the Goddess, I found you."


	14. Chapter 14 - It's Always a Prophecy

"Bloody, buggering hell. Red!"

"Willow. Been dimension hopping again?"

"Willow, my dear. Good to see you back safe. Have you got the last bit of information we needed?"

"Will! Long time no see."

"Willow, it's nice to see you again."

"Hi Willow. It's been a while since you popped over."

"Hi Wills. Just in time for breakfast."

"Hi guys. Wow, full on Scooby meeting. Without me. That's like having curry without vegie pilau. Dawnie, you're glowing. Yes, Giles, I think I've got some really good leads. Ages, Buffy, teehee. You too, Angel. Has been a while Nina. You're looking good. I always have great timing, Xan. Goddess! Spike? Spike, you're here and not..."

"Yeah, yeah, Red. Not undead. Story's done and dusted. On the epilogue now."

"Maybe for you Spike, but I'm yet to be informed of your miraculous return. Once again."

"Right, course, Rupert. Short story. Came back couple months ago. Here. Angel found me. Took me in. Work for him and Nina. The end." Still in love with your slayer, he added under his breath.

"Curry without what?"

"Sorry Xan. Just got back from India. Totally excellent food. Amazing really what they can do with a couple of vegetables and some rice. Best thing to go with curry, beside poppadums, of course. Gosh, speaking of food, I could so eat. Those pancakes look yummy! You work for Angel?"

"He does, Willow. In one of our supermarkets."

"Oh, I thought maybe you might be back to helping the helpless."

"We do. We feed them."

"Spike's a check out chick... er person." Xander held his hands up in all innocence. "Just a slip, dead boy junior. Honest."

"Right. Do-nut..." Spike saw Dawn's raised eyebrow, ducked his head.

"So, come and sit here, between me and Giles, Will. You can order some pancakes and fill us in on what you found after. Unless it's like world saveage time right now?" Buffy looked up with a questioning gaze.

"Nah. It'll keep." Willow sat on the offered chair and looked up to see a waitress hovering at her elbow. "Oh, I'll have the blueberry pancakes please and a vanilla latte." She looked around the table. "Gosh, I can't think the last time we were all together like this. Well, except for you, of course, Spike." He nodded at her and she studied him in return. He looked good, she thought. A little agitated but probably to be expected, suddenly surrounded by everyone, again. "So... back again, huh? How's that going?"

"Um... fine, Red. Been a few months now. Was a bit doo-lally at first, but Angel and Nina have been real kind. Specially Nina. 'S good, yeah." He smiled that shy, disarming smile, that'd always made her forget he was a vampire. "An' you?"

"Oh, same old, same old. I travel a lot. For the council. Senior witch, now. Round the world, different dimensions. It's interesting. I've just been chasing down a prophecy Giles found in one of the old journals."

"Always a prophecy, aint it?" He snickered.

"Quite. This prophecy is a little different. It seems to have just appeared, in this particular journal, recently. Quite strange, though not without precedent. It is, as is often the case, rather vague in its interpretation. Willow has been researching some ancient Hindi scrolls for me, in an attempt to clarify it."

"Hindi? Some weird and strange shite goes on in India, Rupert. Been there a time or two, back in the day, when me and Dru were travelling. The things we saw an' heard. Curl your toes, some of it. Humans can be quite inventive, put us demons to shame."

"Yes, well, a story best for another time, perhaps."

"It's not all blood and fang, Rupes. Took in the culture, checked in with some of the more religious types. I liked to learn the local lingo and such. Lotta time on your hands when you're a vampire. Can't always be about the killing, you know, watcher."

"Ah, I see. Actually, I don't know that at all, Spike. The knowledge of vampires the Council has acquired over the centuries, is based solely on cataloguing their deeds of destruction and the best methods of their destruction. Beyond looking at such things as siring, mating, feeding, little is known of what vampires actually do. This despite there having been two souled vampires in the world. Neither of which cared to share."

"Yeah, well, maybe you never really wanted to know, mate." Spike sat back, arms folded, the image of closed conversation.

Giles sighed. "Perhaps you're right. Certainly the last time you and I were together the situation was rather dire and the time for research of vampires was past. Though I do recall an earlier offer on my part, that you could perhaps, join us. Rudely rebuffed, on your part, as I recall."

"Come on, watcher. I'd not long been chipped. Was caught between your world and mine, mourning what I'd lost and wandering how the hell I was going to survive."

"Guys, chill! It's breakfast. Let's save the recriminations of the past for later, okay?"

"That's a big word for you, Slayer." He groaned as soon as he'd said it. Stupid.

"And I told you, Spike, to call me Buffy. It's my name and I like it." The smile was saccharine sweet. The tone was not. He grimaced, nodded to acknowledge his error.

"Is that why you're all here, Giles. Because of this prophecy?" Nina looked at the man, she only ever got to meet when something bad was going to happen.

"Yes, Nina. I'm afraid it is. The one thing the prophecy is specific on, is the place." He smiled at the woman.

"Oh, I was hoping you were just passing through. It's been so quiet here. Well, supernaturally. Still plenty of bad human stuff." She smiled a little sadly and looked at her husband. He reached for her hand and gave it a little squeeze before bringing it to his lips.

"It'll be okay."


End file.
